Children’s Book Recommendations

Part One

This list is not comprehensive, it really just includes many of my personal favorites as well as some recommendations from my good friend and death doulah, Debbie Eisenbise of Through the Threshold. I’m offering here a thumbnail of the covers and the blurb on the books. If I include personal thoughts I’ll throw them in as parentheticals. I think I’ll offer this as a two-parter because as I’m putting the list together, I’m realizing it’s actually pretty long. I think part one will be my recs and part two I’ll devote to Debbie’s. I have one from my friend Becky Cooper (English adjunct extraordinaire) as well.

The Halloween Tree by Ray BradBury

[From Barnes and Noble] Join the shadowy Carapace Clavicle Moundshroud as he takes eight trick-or-treaters on an unforgettable journey to find their missing friend, Pip. Travel through space and time, from the tombs of ancient Egypt to the gargoyles of Notre-Dame Cathedral, all the way to the cemeteries of Mexico on el Día de Los Muertos, the Day of the Dead. Is Pip still alive? And if so, can his friends save him from a ghastly fate before it’s too late? (I’m not sure most folks who read this one see it as an allegory for death, but maybe I’m not giving them enough credit. I would definitely reserve this one for the older kids, although we did read it to M when he was about 7. I revisit this one personally every Halloween season.)

Duck, Death and the Tulip by Wolf Erlbruch

[From Amazon] In a curiously heart-warming and elegantly illustrated story, a duck strikes up an unlikely friendship with Death. Duck and Death play together and discuss big questions. Death, dressed in a dressing gown and slippers, is sympathetic and kind and will be duck’s companion until the end. (This is such a sweet story and I think it’s appropriate for all ages. It made me tear up. M liked it quite a bit. The illustrations are really lovely too.)

Where Do They Go? By Julia Alvarez

[From Amazon] … a beautifully crafted poem for children that gently addresses the emotional side of death. The book asks, "When somebody dies, where do they go? / Do they go where the wind goes when it blows? ... Do they wink back at me when I wish on a star? Do they whisper, 'You're perfect, just as you are'? ..." Illustrated by Vermont woodcut artist, Sabra Field, Where Do They Go? is a beautiful and comforting meditation on death, asking questions young readers might have about what happens to those they love after they die. [There is also a Spanish language edition of this book available in paperback.] (We got this one from the library and I loved it. It’s very simple and asks the questions without overcomplicating things. I think it’s very comforting.)

Boats for Papa by Jessixa Bagley

[From Amazon] Buckley and his Mama live in a cozy cabin by the ocean. He loves to carve boats out of the driftwood he finds on the beach nearby. He makes: big boats, long boats, short boats and, tall boats, each one more beautiful than the last, and sends them out to sea. If they don't come back, he knows they've found their way to his papa, whom he misses very much. In this stunning debut, author/illustrator Jessixa Bagley explores the subtle and deep emotions associated with loss in a heartwarming tale that is sure to stay with the reader long after the book is closed. (This book made me cry, not gonna lie. It’s a beautiful story about a little boy’s loss and a mother’s willingness to do anything to bring comfort to her son.)

The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman

[From Amazon] Bod is an unusual boy who inhabits an unusual place—he's the only living resident of a graveyard. Raised from infancy by the ghosts, werewolves, and other cemetery denizens, Bod has learned the antiquated customs of his guardians' time as well as their ghostly teachings—such as the ability to Fade so mere mortals cannot see him. Can a boy raised by ghosts face the wonders and terrors of the worlds of both the living and the dead? The Graveyard Book is the winner of the Newbery Medal, the Carnegie Medal, the Hugo Award for best novel, the Locus Award for Young Adult novel, the American Bookseller Association’s “Best Indie Young Adult Buzz Book,” a Horn Book Honor, and Audio Book of the Year. Don't miss this modern classic—whether shared as a read-aloud or read independently, it's sure to appeal to readers ages 8 and up.  (Here, again, while not overtly about death aside from taking place in a graveyard, I think this is a good one to bring up the discussion. It certainly explores a lot of themes of death and dying while ultimately being about LIVING. I actually take my work email signature quote – which hasn’t changed in 15 years - from this book. “If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all you will have gained.”)

The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman

[From Amazon] This bewitching and harrowing tale of mystery and survival, and memory and magic, makes the impossible all too real... (I suspect people with disagree with me about this one, but I firmly believe this is a book about death. I mean yes, there is death in the book, but more broadly this story reads to me as a look at what makes us human and how we make meaning of our lives before we die. I would reserve this one for older kids/teens because I do think it’s a bit existential. Maybe Neil would disagree with my interpretation of this book, but I suppose he’d know better than I. Then again, if you ask me, once you put it out there, people are meant to make what they will of it, when it comes to art. I’d love to have a conversation with Gaiman about it though. *ahem*)

The Map of Memory Lane by Francesca Lynn Arnoldy

[From Amazon] When Lee asks Nana if she will live forever, Nana explains how people can visit a special place when they want to remember someone—a place where memories are treasured. MAP OF MEMORY LANE is a heartwarming story that gently introduces the topic of loss while celebrating the simple moments we share.

This book welcomes readers of any religion, spirituality, and culture. Adults will discover effective support strategies, like how to let children lead the pacing of communication and how to supply clear, succinct answers to difficult questions. Children will enjoy the immersive illustrations throughout. MAP OF MEMORY LANE prompts meaningful conversations and perhaps even the creation of one's own map of Memory Lane.